The choice is really yours

When the miners were rescued from the Copiapó copper mine in Chile, their putative leader, Mario Sepúlveda (super Mario) explained the decisions that were made that allowed the men to weather their ordeal with as much grace and optimism as possible. In post-rescue interviews, Mario said he felt as if he had faced the devil on one shoulder; God for the other. He had chosen to listen to God.

I don’t know if Mario meant it literally, but it’s a pretty good metaphor that deserves some examination.

We can see this as: GOOD vs. EVIL/HOPE vs. DESPAIR / STRENGTH vs. WEAKNESS and so and so… you get the idea.

The men in the mine, when requesting the supplies they needed during their time underground, asked for, among other things, razors and toothpaste. Why razors? Why toothpaste? What difference would it make if they stayed messy or had bad breath? Mario Sepúlveda understood that these personal care items could make a difference.

I guess what Mario knew, intuitively, was that routines, courtesies, and self-care allow us to hold on to our humanity, even in the most inhumane of circumstances. It’s not about designer clothes or making a good impression. The point is that attending to our embodied selves (which, of course, is connected to our psyche) reminds us that we all have intrinsic value. To paraphrase L’Oreal commercials, “…because we’re worth it.”

When these men shaved, brushed their teeth, shared what little food they had, they behaved “as if” they had a future beyond mine. I’m pretty sure this attitude led to other acts of self-preservation. Practiced daily, the men reinforced the belief that they would be released. Had they fought over food, turned on each other, abandoned simple acts of grooming like brushing their teeth, their collective mood would likely have plummeted and the outcome of their ordeal far less enthusiastic than expected. that we witnessed how they left the mine.

Many of us have fallen into psychological black holes.

It’s hard for me to imagine what it would be like to literally be forced to live in one for 70 days. These men have reinforced, for me, my belief in the resilience and ingenuity that resides in each of us. If they refused to give up hope, why should we? If they could call on their courage and hold on to it for that long, isn’t that possible for all of us? When trouble knocks on our door, it’s common to feel weak, unprepared, and overwhelmed. When we face our challenges, using our wits and imagination, we rise above the ordinary and the hero within us watches over us as we find our way out of the black hole into which we have fallen.

We all have the instinct to survive. One of our problems is that when life feels out of control, we often forget that we have that ally deep within. During difficult times, we have a tendency to see our challenges as dense lumps that we cannot hope to move or penetrate. The truth is that no matter which direction we approach our trials from, one path leads to another, and even if we merely see a speck of light ahead, we succeed when we keep tunneling toward that light. The landscape we find when we head out may not look the way it used to, or the way we wish it did, but once we’ve regained the ability to run, we have the opportunity to design something new…something that reflects the lessons we’ve learned. we learned. we have learned during our struggle. We may end up with something unexpectedly amazing and beautiful.

Wisdom is gained through experience. We can acquire knowledge from our schools and books, but wisdom is what we get as we travel through our lives. No one applauds when a tragedy occurs. Our responses to unexpected negative events lead us to a greater understanding of who we are. Hopefully, this self-awareness will lead us to greater compassion and understanding of others.

The tools we use to navigate our journey through life must be continually updated, sharpened, and refined. We do ourselves a disservice when we return to old platitudes that no longer have any real meaning. Unfortunately, to find ourselves and know who we really are, we must absorb pain, loss and disappointment. The good news is that once we have known loss, unless we are numb, we will not take our joys for granted.

Join when you can. Laugh, scream and scream and don’t worry about those who want to trample your joy. Time changes everything. Always remember to head towards the light.

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