To conquer low self-esteem we must first know what ‘self-esteem’ is or at least our own definition of it. Below are the definitions of common people and as you will see they vary from person to person; choose a definition of self-esteem that most closely matches your own description.
– Self-esteem is when I feel good about myself.
– Live according to my own values, beliefs and convictions.
– Self-esteem is the absence of self-hatred.
– Being sure that I can achieve anything I set my mind to.
– A state of total and absolute freedom. Freedom to choose to be myself.
– When I love and accept myself deeply and completely.
Now let’s look at an opposite for each definition of self-esteem in the list above and from there we can begin to see what low self-esteem is.
– Self-esteem is when I feel bad about myself.
– Live according to the values, beliefs and convictions of another person.
– Self-esteem is the presence of contempt for oneself.
– There is no confidence in achieving anything.
– A state of total and absolute restriction. Compliance with all others
– I did not like
If you or someone you know has low self-esteem, it will be based on one of the above or a similar one, but when you boil it down to the heart of the matter, low self-esteem basically means ‘a low opinion of oneself’. You feel guilt in yourself and your ability to cope with your life experience and this can often be masked with aggressive and/or boastful behaviour.
Other symptoms include; habitually putting others down, fear of change, sensitivity to criticism, criticism of others, criticism of oneself, perfectionism, a constant need to prove oneself or impress others, etc. etc. there are many symptoms and people will hide behind the bravado while inside they feel in a state of insecurity and panic.
They will often feel that they are the victim and that it is someone else’s fault or they will blame the circumstances or the environment in which they live or what they want but cannot have as the reason they feel so depressed. It’s never their fault or it’s always their fault and they spend most of their time stuck in a cycle of hate and self-pity, whether it’s obvious to others or not.
As you can see, the total focus when you are in a state of low self-esteem is on what is wrong or to blame for the unhappiness or circumstances you are experiencing and from that you are accomplishing more than you can. who is focusing. It is becoming a habit and a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Overcoming low self-esteem and breaking the habit involves changing your approach. It’s not going to happen overnight. Habits are formed over a long time and you have to retrain your mind to focus on what is good and right in your life instead of what is wrong. Whenever you feel yourself moving into a negative state, focus on the good things you have in your life. It can be as simple as the sun on your back on a summer day, the love of a pet, or the smell of roses in spring.
Life could never be so miserable that joy is totally devoid of it; Get in the habit of seeing the good in yourself and others. Get in the habit of seeing what is positive in your life and instead of feeling lack and limitation. Feel the joy of being thankful and appreciative even if what you are experiencing is ‘real’. Even if you are experiencing great difficulties, take heart in the fact that this is temporary and that your new approach is giving you a much better life.